Wake Up And Smell That Nata De Coco

On Monday I woke up with this fantastic sense of power.

And I don’t want to forget it.

There are 19 things under the cut.

1. 46 chromosomes and I have the right number of limbs, nothing more and nothing less. I’m a miracle for turning out fairly normal.
2. I don’t know how I did it and how I didn’t notice it before, but hey I’ve got a pretty hot pair of elbows, and the rest of me are pretty banging too. wahahahahaha.
3. I have been privileged to have a legion of the most amazing bunch of friends that I can count on: people I admire, respect, adore and love without reservation.
4. We own the modest roof over our heads without debt.
5. I can never ask for a kinder, more supportive and unbelievably patient set of parents who never fails to entertain my curiosity and have always been there to fund my crazy dreams.
6. I’ve got a play under my name. That hardly makes me a playwright I know but it’s a baby of my own. It is thoroughly utterly completely mine, aaaaaaaaaall maaaaaaaaain.
7. My hair is a lush mass of ebony streaked with purple and pink.
8. It’s been behaving so well lately too.
9. And it smells like NATA DE COCO!
10. Though I still have traces of history’s venom underneath my skin, i accept it as an indelible part of who I am with relief and without regret. You’ve forged the steel under my skin.
11. It hadn’t occur to me that coming through all the histrionics as a relatively well-balanced and normal human being can be considered a feat. It is exhausting. There will be days when my eyelids feels older than it is but life moves on. It gets better every year.
12. Brothaa all your summer lessons about the fascinating world of boys I’ll keep forevaaa. No I’m not sorry you broke your brocode and yes you shall end up in brohell since it’s the only thing that closely resembles anything to an afterlife for you. Idiot. haha iz okay. You’ll die a martyr and you’ll get your 72 sluts kayz.
13. I don’t have to worry about many things like tuition fees.
14. Two As, and an A- baby! yeah we’re going to ignore Finance and IR. which brings this year’s total of As to: four  A-, three As, a B+ and two B-. Hell yeah! My GPA has not been shredded to bits.
15. I have every capability to go after That Job and rock it in a way that no one else can.
16. I am someone i wouldn’t mind having a cup of sweetened lemon tea with. [sounds familiar dawn (=]
17. People may come and go and leave imprints in their wake. It takes effort from both sides to meet in the middle if you want to stay in each other’s lives without manipulative tactics. Do you want to know the rules? Sincerity and effort.
18. I am cognizant of the potential coursing through my veins and damn it feels powerful.
19. The details I keep. The accumulation of my grandpa’s affection tucked safe inside my belly from his guava juice and cakes. Swirly dresses sewn by grandma preserved in childhood photographs.  The way her soft flesh gives underneath my hugs.

All of these possessions you can never take away from me. You will never be able to discount its value. Combined, they form my every little fibre. I am invincible. I don’t need friction to bolster my own ego.

So it goes that I expect nothing but the same respect, affection and attention that I give you. Simple as that. So it goes with relationships: I will ask for what I want but I won’t stand for anything less. Neither should you.

It’s been a very long nineteen years. Though at times it feels lonely, I’m learning to accept that aloneness is man’s nature. We do everything we can in art and in science to bridge that gap but it will remain. That’s the beauty of societies I suppose: that we do everything we can to live with each other. We’re given the illusion that all of this bounty is limitless but it isn’t.

Fierce and finite, love: how much time do I have left with you?

forget it. we’re doomed
you will always be alone
might as well love it.